Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
He better not be in your backpack
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Randomize