and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
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