just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Randomize
