Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize
