Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Randomize
