pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Randomize
