Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Randomize
