it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
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