i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
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