apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
Randomize
