And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Randomize