Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Randomize
