these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
She's better-looking with the mask on.
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