dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
