That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize
