Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(507): View more from Minnesota

We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.

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(702): View more from Nevada

Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad

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(443): View more from Maryland

There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.

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(303): View more from Colorado

we're about an hour out, how's the weather?

(720): View more from Colorado

cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.

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(804): View more from Virginia

Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony

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(619): View more from California

Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently

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(775): View more from Nevada

Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?

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(843): View more from South Carolina

He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy

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(631): View more from New York

i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise

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