remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
Randomize
