I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Randomize