I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize
