One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
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