Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Randomize
