i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
