Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
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