He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize