How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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