my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
ttyl tear gas
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Randomize
