She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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