waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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