This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
