I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
