Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
Randomize
