So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
Randomize
