He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
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