Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
if i died would you start the facebook group?
i will never coherently bang her
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize
