Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
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