watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
Randomize
