all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
Randomize
