told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
splinters make it hard to masturbate
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
