It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
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