'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
Randomize
