im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
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