You're my little dorito
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
