Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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