? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
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