Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
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