Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
Randomize
