Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
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