Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
Randomize
