Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
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