I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
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